Talking to someone you have never met can be great. It can also go wrong if you share too much too quickly. Most people you meet in an anonymous chat are exactly who they seem to be: students looking for a conversation. A few are not, and the habits in this guide protect you from those few without turning every chat into a security check.
Think of these habits like locking your door. You do not do it because you expect a break-in on any given night. You do it because it takes two seconds and removes the risk.
The easiest way to stay safe is to decide ahead of time what you will not share, so you are not making that decision under social pressure in the middle of a good conversation. As a starting point, keep these private:
General things are fine, and they are what makes a chat fun: your course, your favorite food, a show you are watching, a class you cannot stand. The line to remember is the difference between interesting and findable. Interesting details help a conversation along. Findable details help a stranger locate you.
Most bad situations show warning signs early. Watch for these:
Moving to Instagram, Messenger or a phone number is a bigger step than it looks, because those accounts often show your real name, photos, school and friends. Before you share one, ask yourself whether you would be comfortable with this person seeing everything on that profile.
If you do want to stay in touch, wait until you have had several good conversations over time. You can also use a separate account with limited information for new online friends.
Ending a chat is always allowed and never rude. You do not owe anyone an explanation. If something makes you uncomfortable, such as sexual messages, harassment, threats or pressure for personal information, end the chat and use the report button. Reports go to real moderators who can review a snapshot of the conversation, so you do not need to screenshot anything or argue with the other person.
If an online friendship grows and you decide to meet, treat it like meeting any new person. Pick a busy public place during the day. Tell a trusted friend where you are going and who you are meeting. Arrange your own transportation, and leave if anything feels off. Do not feel bad about canceling at the last minute.
If someone threatens you, shares your private information, or you feel you are in immediate danger, contact your local authorities or a trusted adult right away. Keep any evidence of what happened, and tell a friend or family member. You did nothing wrong by trusting someone who broke that trust, and getting support early makes everything easier to handle.
Simple, low-pressure ways to open a chat, keep it going, handle silence and end a conversation kindly, whether you are online or on campus.
Making Friends in College: A Practical Guide for FreshmenA realistic guide to building friendships in your first year of college: where to meet people, how to turn acquaintances into friends and why patience matters.
How BUbble Moderation Works: Reports, Bans and Your SafetyAn open look at how BUbble keeps chats and the forum safe: age requirement, the report button, what moderators see, and how warnings and bans work.